TRUST YOUR GUT

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In the last twenty-four hours I have heard from two friends each in crisis with a loved one and uncertain how to proceed. Both were going through that awful self-questioning I’ve put myself through to many times.

“Is something bad happening?”

“Am I overreacting? Is it just the dementia?”

“Maybe I should wait and see?”

“Should I call an ambulance?”

“Should I call the doctor or not?”

“Should I tell (whoever has just called to chat) what’s going on?”

“Is it my imagination?”

“What is going on?

The answer is simple and impossibly hard:

Go with your gut. Trust your instinct. Don’t worry if you’re wrong.

I have asked each of these questions, at least once all of them together.  I have worried that I was over- or under- reacting and then afterwards have berated myself for not acting sooner or for acting too quickly.

But in each case I ultimately trusted my instinct. Sometimes I trusted it more than other times and sometimes my instinct was more right than other times, but it was never entirely wrong.

 In hindsight, I can say definitely that there is no definite right or wrong.

This is the advice I want to imprint in my brain, and yours: When facing one of these horrible moments we all will face, TRUST my/your INSTINCT and DO NOT BLAME my/yourself whatever the outcome.

6 thoughts on “TRUST YOUR GUT

    1. Dealing with blame has been the big lesson of dementia for me probably, one I’m still struggling with–both of myself and others…..thanks for writing

      Like

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